Dengdeng had originally wanted to remain calm and continue pretending to be a little wooden statue.
But earlier, in order to lure them deeper into the mountains and upgrade the challenge, the production team had painted an enormous, perfectly round pie of promises about Ganoderma.
Tang Can had extensive experience being exploited in his previous life, so the more he listened, the more suspicious it sounded. In Dengdeng’s limited three years of life, the original Bad Dad had never needed sophisticated manipulation techniques like promising imaginary future rewards in order to torment him.
Combined with his longing for first place—which meant delicious food and comfortable sleep—the word “Ganoderma” had practically taken root inside his little heart.
The more Dengdeng wanted first place, the more he wanted to enter the mountains and gather Ganoderma. Under the production team’s constant promises, the two ideas had become almost inseparable, as though only entering the deep mountains and finding Ganoderma could count as genuine victory.
Even the valuable kidney-tonic tea Tang Can had gathered felt different to him.
But there had been no choice. Bad Dad was sick, and his hand was injured. They could only leave it at that…
Who would have expected them to run into Ganoderma by accident while descending the mountain—and not just one, but many plants growing together!
Little Huo Dengdeng simply could not hold himself back anymore. His gray-blue eyes seemed to contain two searchlights, the corners of his mouth launched upward, and his baby voice carried unprecedented excitement. “Ganoderma! So much Ganoderma!”
Tang Can was equally overjoyed. There was no helping it. This was truly an astonishing surprise.
Running into undiscovered red Ganoderma at the foot of the mountain was absurd enough. Finding such a large cluster was even more unbelievable.
If he had not experienced it personally, no one would believe the story.
Tang Can stepped forward and counted. Around the outer wall of the thick larch stump grew seven Ganoderma mushrooms of varying sizes.
Two of them looked especially valuable. One was nearly the width of both his palms together, while the other approached three palms across. Besides those, three were particularly small, only about palm-sized.
Although Tang Can had done some research while traveling into the mountain and roughly knew what could be gathered and sold, his knowledge was still shallow. He did not understand much beyond the basics.
Worried that he might harvest immature “baby mushrooms” too early, he turned toward the old guide. “Uncle, can these three little ones be picked too?”
Afraid the old guide might keep misleading him, Tang Can’s naturally smiling peach-blossom eyes were filled with alert seriousness.
The old guide felt somewhat guilty under that stare. He opened his mouth, then thought that things had already reached this point. Why keep playing games and embarrass himself further?
He sighed and told the truth. “You can. Look, even though these are small, the yellow edges have already disappeared. They’re at full maturity…”
“Don’t assume that because they’re small you should leave them longer and maybe they’ll grow bigger,” the old guide said, waving his hands repeatedly. “They’ve reached their limit. If you leave them here instead of harvesting them, they’ll become old, dead Ganoderma. Then they’re no different from rotten wood. You’d actually be wasting the mountain’s treasure.”
Afraid outsiders might misunderstand and think locals harvested even immature seedlings, the old guide explained very carefully. “It’s like people being naturally different heights. Some people grow over one meter eighty or ninety, while others stop around one meter fifty or sixty—little short beans.”
Comments:
【??? One meter sixty makes you a little short bean?! Believe it or not, I’ll jump up and hit your knee!】
【The logic may be right, but did you have to say it that brutally?!】
【Hahahahaha, simple and easy to understand. (183 cm tall)】
Once Tang Can heard that all three small ones could be harvested, the other two medium-sized mushrooms were obviously fine as well. He became even happier, his eyes curving with his smile as he continued asking the old guide how to harvest them.
The normal method was simply to pull them off, much like picking ordinary mushrooms. But for the two obviously oversized premium specimens, the old guide pulled an axe from his basket and directly helped Tang Can chop away the decayed wood beneath them.
He also gathered plenty of weeds nearby and taught Tang Can how to use the leaves to protect the Ganoderma from bumps and damage during transport. Keeping the wooden base attached would help preserve the appearance so mushrooms of this grade could sell for a good price.
Tang Can could tell that the old guide had truly abandoned the production team’s tricks and returned to his naturally simple, honest character.
The guide’s legs and feet were clearly uncomfortable too. Otherwise, he would not have temporarily replaced Tang Can’s original guide and accompanied him down the mountain early.
Under those circumstances, he could easily have given a few perfunctory instructions and ended his work earlier. This certainly was not included in the production team’s contract requiring him to mislead the guests. Yet the old man not only refused to cut corners, he explained everything carefully and taught Tang Can step by step.
Even though the valuable mushrooms had absolutely nothing to do with him, he was still terrified that Tang Can, an ignorant outsider, would ruin good produce. He was simply a genuinely plain and kindhearted old man.
Tang Can always repaid grudges, but he also repaid kindness. If people who helped without expecting anything in return never received anything good back, that would be far too depressing.
So Tang Can wrapped and tied the five small and medium Ganoderma, then directly stuffed them into the old guide’s basket. “Uncle, without you, these two ‘one-meter-eighty tall guys’ would definitely sell for much less. As thanks, these five little short beans can—”
Before Tang Can even finished, the old man had already pulled the Ganoderma out and shoved them back into his arms. “What are you doing?! I only talked you through it. How could I take your things? What kind of person do you think I am?”
“…Take them back! Otherwise I’ll get angry!”
And so the two of them pushed the mushrooms back and forth all the way out of the mountain. Even after their feet reached the asphalt road, Tang Can still had not managed to give them away.
Not only did their movements become larger and larger, their voices grew louder than each other’s. It looked less like giving a gift and more like having a fight.
Tang Can was almost too hoarse to keep shouting. He finally decided to follow local custom and use the most traditional gift-giving technique possible. “Uncle, stop pushing them back! Just consider them a gift for your children. Why are you refusing?”
Unexpectedly, the old guide’s eyes widened. “I don’t have children. You can’t give them to children who don’t exist!”
Tang Can assumed the old man was making that up to refuse the gift, but the guide merely smiled openly. “I don’t have children, but I have my wife. I hear lots of young people these days can’t even find partners. I’m already doing very, very well. No kids, and I’m still ridiculously happy!”
Comments:
【Fine, fine. So we one-meter-sixty single dogs are the only ones taking repeated critical hits today!】
【Great. You two are joking around by gouging out the viewers’ eyes, huh?!】
【Passing single dog here: I don’t even know what happened. Somehow I got kicked for no reason at all. QAQ…】
Tang Can was also blindsided by the old man showing off his happiness. But when he saw the guide visibly relax his guard, Tang Can immediately tossed the five wrapped little Ganoderma at his feet, picked up the child, turned, and ran.
Now it was the old guide’s turn to stop smiling.
Following the law of transferred smiles, Tang Can took over instead, baring his teeth in a huge grin as he ran.
It had already been a friendly back-and-forth refusal of gifts. Tang Can’s flexible surprise maneuver, combined with his highly infectious laughter, immediately made the comments laugh along with him.
Only the toddler in his arms remained confused. Clearly, his little brain still could not understand this kind of friendly social exchange, but he could tell that Bad Dad was hiding from Grandpa Guide.
Dengdeng was being carried with his face pointed backward. He thought for a moment, then still warned Tang Can beside his ear. “Grandpa… Grandpa is chasing us!”
Tang Can looked back. Holy crap?!
Wasn’t the old man supposed to have bad legs? He had already walked through the mountain for so long and could still run this fast. He was obviously far sturdier than Tang Can, a young man in his prime!
“You—you—hey! Young man, stop running! I’ll accept the Ganoderma! I wanted to ask whether you’re selling your things!!”
Only then did Tang Can stop. Panting heavily, he confirmed, “You mean it? If you try giving them back again, I’ll get angry too.”
The old man was equally breathless and laughed helplessly at that. “Don’t worry! Thank you! This time I really accept them!”
Then he immediately got to the real matter. The guides’ job was supposed to end at the foot of the mountain anyway. At most, they would point the guests toward somewhere that bought mountain products.
That was what the old guide had originally done. From the moment they started descending, he had been telling father and son roughly where the buying station was. After leaving the mountain, they only needed to walk a few hundred meters north to reach a seasonal purchasing point.
Many people entered the mountain at this time of year, including plenty of tourists. A lot of people were too lazy to make another trip to the town market after coming down, so they sold their finds directly there.
But the purchasing station earned money by buying low and selling high. Selling there was much more convenient, but the price could be half what the goods were really worth.
That did not matter much for cheap products, but the two large Ganoderma Tang Can had found could sell for nearly a thousand yuan.
Tang Can had extensive experience being beaten around by working life, but this was the kind of insider knowledge only someone in the trade would understand. He knew middlemen obviously made a profit, but he had not imagined they could take half.
And judging from the old man’s meaning, there was probably even more to it. The real industry details were simply inconvenient to discuss in front of a livestream camera.
“…Just sell them directly to me. I happen to be going to the market tomorrow morning to sell goods. Don’t worry. I definitely won’t make money off you. Whatever they sell for is exactly what you’ll get.”
Tang Can’s eyes instantly lit up. “That would be perfect! Uncle, you really are my own dear uncle!”
The old man wiped his forehead somewhat awkwardly. “I can’t take your things for free either. It’s only right.”
After learning that Tang Can needed money for food, the old man simply brought father and son back to his home. He planned to advance Tang Can money based on the estimated price first. They exchanged contact information and would settle any difference afterward.
Tang Can repeatedly emphasized that the old man absolutely could not secretly give him extra.
Eventually, the old man became a little annoyed by his nagging. “You’re so young. How is your mouth already this long-winded…”
Tang Can thought that he had not originally been like this either. After starting work, he had unconsciously become a chatterbox.
For a period of time, he had even developed a habit of repeating himself, automatically saying the same sentence two or three times without realizing it.
It was simply because he had grown accustomed to teaching and speaking to small children and was always afraid they would not understand. Fortunately, he had stopped himself before the habit got worse. Now he merely talked a little too much.
“Look, you’re changing the subject again. You still haven’t promised me you won’t give extra. Don’t tell me you accepted the five little short beans on the surface but plan to secretly make it up to me in cash?”
One look at the old man’s eyes, which were flickering more brightly than stars, and Tang Can turned to leave. “Absolutely not. I’d rather let a middleman make the profit. If you help me this much and I keep taking food and gifts too, what kind of person does that make me…”
The old man had been read completely. He nearly transformed into the classic “even the Monkey King is fed up” reaction image, whipping his head aside and stamping his foot. “Oh, you young man! You were impossible to fool when I was trying to trick you, and now you’re impossible to help when I’m trying to be nice!”
Tang Can smiled brightly and teased, “If you had just been completely honest with me from the beginning, wouldn’t everything have been fine~”
Mentioning that made the old man regret everything again. “Don’t bring it up. Making a little money from your production team isn’t easy. At first we thought it was ordinary tour-guide work. Only after signing did we find a tiny clause saying we had to cooperate with scripted acting. We don’t know how to act! It took ridiculous effort, and then you brat didn’t believe a word…”
Tang Can immediately shared his outrage. “The production team tricks you people too?!”
“Don’t even mention it. We’re earning cabbage money while carrying the anxiety of running an illegal contraband business. If the village leaders hadn’t said it would help promote the area, we’d rather lead normal tour groups.”
After arguing a little longer, the old man finally had no choice but to raise his hand and swear. “Fine, stop nagging. I guarantee I won’t give you one cent extra.”
Tang Can had almost believed him, but when he saw the old man raise three fingers, his brows immediately drew together with vigilance. “Uncle, are you still exploiting a loophole with me?”
The old man looked at Tang Can, then at his hand. “What are you talking about??”
“Don’t people swear with two fingers?” Tang Can was not entirely certain himself, but he had to ask—especially after seeing the old man’s living conditions. He truly felt embarrassed taking even one extra cent.
The old man processed this for a while. “What? You remembered wrong. It’s three fingers! They correspond to heaven, earth, and humanity… Wait. After all this, you still don’t trust me!”
At those words, something seemed to flash through Tang Can’s mind. Before he could think carefully, however, the old man’s accusation dragged him off track.
The two went through another long round of back-and-forth before the old man ultimately accepted the kidney-tonic tea as well.
Four or five half-kilograms of fresh kidney-tonic tea would dry down to roughly half a kilogram. After estimating everything, the old man transferred Tang Can a total of one thousand yuan.
Besides the kidney-tonic tea and Ganoderma, Tang Can had also gathered a small handful of cheap schisandra, which he left with the old man as well.
When accepting the kidney-tonic tea, the old man could not resist muttering, “You brat really are lucky. We saw this tea when we tied the ladder to the tree. But we thought stripping the whole tree bare would look ugly on television, so we deliberately left it there. Then you brat harvested every last bit.”
Tang Can laughed even harder. “I knew there had to be a reason such a bargain was still sitting there. Thank you to all the people of Changyun Mountain for showing mercy!”
The old man laughed too. The child in Tang Can’s arms had originally been absorbed in his own thoughts, but the atmosphere inevitably infected him and the corners of his lips rose as well.
The moment Dengdeng realized he was smiling, however, he quickly straightened his mouth again. Thoughtfully, he remembered something Bad Dad had asked not long ago… Bad Dad really seemed not to know that people swore with three fingers?
After saying goodbye to the old man, Tang Can began figuring out how they would return.
Changyun Village was only a small village, but because the area was vigorously developing tourism, it contained many guesthouses, restaurants, and local-specialty shops. The guesthouse where Tang Can had stayed the previous night happened to be in the central area.
Tang Can planned to take the child back near that guesthouse to spend money. At the very least, they had to order a huge plate of cauliflower mushroom first.
But the production team’s bus had been rented for all four groups. Since he was acting alone now, he could not possibly wait at the mountain foot for the other three groups.
The distance back to Changyun Village was difficult to solve. Ordinary tourists either came with tour groups or chartered cars. Like they had that morning, most traveled directly from guesthouses to the foot of the mountain. There was almost no public transport along the way, and taxis were difficult to hail.
Tang Can asked the old man whether he knew any drivers he could call. Instead, the old man directly called over a neighbor. “Little Chen happens to be delivering mountain produce to a restaurant near there. You two can just ride with him.”
Little Chen, the neighbor, drove a local “half-truck,” and there happened to be room in the vehicle. Since he was going that way anyway, he refused to accept any fare. The old guide beside them became even more insistent, saying it would be outrageous to fuss over such a tiny amount of money.
Unable to refuse such hospitality, Tang Can reluctantly accepted the free ride. Only after carrying the child to the vehicle did he realize that a “half-truck” meant a pickup truck.
In other words, a small truck with the front half like a regular car and an open cargo bed attached behind it.
And the seats for Tang Can and his child were two little folding stools placed in the corner of the open-air cargo bed.
Tang Can had just opened his mouth to say he was deeply moved but had to decline when the old man shoved him aboard. The guide’s attitude was extremely firm. “If you keep being polite with me about this too, then you’re going too far!”
Tang Can: “This time I really wasn’t…”
The old man flashed a grin. “This time you can be!”
As he spoke, he latched the tailgate, then smiled and waved goodbye to the sticky-rice dumpling in Tang Can’s arms. “Sweet little baby, go eat something delicious with your daddy~ Come visit Grandpa again if you get the chance~”
It was difficult to imagine that the guide, who had spoken in a rough booming voice all the way through the mountains, unconsciously softened his voice when addressing the toddler. The result was both rough and thin, sweet and gravelly at once.
Tang Can could only sit on the little stool, rub the child’s fluffy head, and say, “…Dengdeng, say goodbye to Grandpa.”
Dengdeng blinked his sparkling eyes, his baby voice becoming even sweeter at the thought of the delicious food awaiting him. “Grandpa~ bye-bye~”
Tang Can melted first. “Oh my precious baby, you’re way too cute!”
The vehicle started moving. Just as Tang Can lowered his head to ruffle the child, two large brown-paper bags suddenly flew into the cargo bed.
Tang Can snapped his head up and met the old man’s triumphant expression. “These are dried hazel mushrooms and pine mushrooms your granny dried. Take them back and eat them! Don’t argue with me. They’re for the child!”
Tang Can did not even have time to argue. The vehicle accelerated and shot far down the road, and before long he could no longer clearly see the smug smile on the old man’s face.
The livestream viewers had never expected another twist. Seeing Tang Can’s defeated expression, they erupted in laughter:
【Grandpa is hilarious. He has a whole set of lines, like a Spring Festival Gala comedy sketch. “They’re for the child”—what a perfect boomerang!】
【We’ve been livestreaming this long and this is the first time I’ve seen Tang Can lose, hahahahahaha. I screenshotted that expression!】
【I’m dying. The elder is still the elder!】
【Holy crap! Wild hazel mushrooms and pine mushrooms from Changyun Mountain? I’ve eaten them! They’re unbelievably delicious!!! Aaaaah, I’m jealous. I also want to lose an argument and win mushrooms!】
【What, what? Are those dried mushrooms really expensive?】
【I wouldn’t call them extremely expensive, but ordinary dried hazel mushrooms can cost close to a hundred yuan per half-kilogram. Pine mushrooms can be twice that, and the wild ones from Changyun Mountain have an especially authentic flavor. Stewed with chicken, they’re divine!】
Tang Can picked up the two large bags and opened them to sniff. One smelled fragrant, while the other had a more distinctive aroma.
But both bags of dried mushrooms were extremely clean and neatly prepared, clearly high-quality. And there was genuinely a huge amount. Each bag was nearly as large as the child.
Seeing Dengdeng’s curiosity, Tang Can directly stuffed one into his arms without caring whether the child could actually hold it. “Here. Grandpa Guide gave all of these to you. Are you happy?”
Although the child had never eaten either variety, the only two kinds of mushrooms he had encountered that morning had both been incredibly delicious. Hearing that these were his made him swallow involuntarily. “Really?”
The child struggled terribly to hold the bags, his little pale paws repeatedly dragging whichever brown-paper bag started sliding down back upward.
But his hands were too small and the bags too big. Both little arms and hands worked frantically, yet solving one problem immediately created another. Even so, he showed absolutely no intention of letting either bag go.
Tang Can struggled not to laugh. Other people were like a clumsy bear breaking corn cobs and dropping one every time it picked up another. His child, however, absolutely refused to abandon even one bag of fragrant food. A remarkably determined little glutton.
Tang Can watched the acrobatic performance for a short while, then voluntarily took one bag to reduce the child’s burden. Otherwise, he genuinely feared the half-hour ride would train the toddler into having enormous muscular arms.
Only then did he continue, “Of course it’s true. Grandpa Guide thought you were especially cute, so he generously gave them to you.” As he spoke, he gestured to show the size. “Two huge bags like this. Looks like our Dengdeng isn’t just ordinarily cute!”
The child very much did not want to believe Bad Dad’s sweet talk, but the words were simply too pleasant to hear. It was also a sugar-coated attack he had never faced before. He had to work very hard to press down the corners of his rising mouth.
Tang Can ruffled the fluffy head twice. “So? Is Grandpa nice?”
“Grandpa is nice!” The instant the child spoke, he could no longer hold his mouth flat. He showed a neat row of little white teeth and smiled brightly. “Grandpa is super nice!~”
Tang Can lightly poked the child’s cheek. “Dengdeng is even cuter when he smiles. Smile more often from now on, okay?”
Feeling the little body stiffen again, Tang Can immediately changed the subject and launched into enthusiastic praise of the simple, honest folk customs in Changyun Village.
At this moment, Tang Can did not yet know that the interaction between him and the old guide would help the guide and the villagers of Changyun Village avoid an online harassment campaign.
Nor did he know that Tang Yichen’s manager, Cheng Ping, had already begun moving in secret, and a wave of malicious rumors was rolling toward him.
*
The return trip lasted more than half an hour. Although Tang Can was sitting on a tiny folding stool, the driver was skilled and the ride remained smooth enough that his backside was not battered.
The sun was not harsh that day either. The light was pleasant. Father and son rode along with a light breeze and beautiful scenery, far more comfortably than on the way there.
Even Dengdeng felt unusually relaxed. At first he sat perfectly upright in Tang Can’s arms, but after the intense exercise of entering the mountain, the warm sunlight and soft breeze soon made him drowsy.
The child comfortably leaned into Tang Can’s embrace, narrowing his eyes as he enjoyed the breeze and scenery while happily swinging both little feet.
Tang Can found him unbearably adorable. Afraid that if the child realized he was being watched he would turn back into a stiff wooden baby, Tang Can held the soft little bundle and secretly admired him the entire way.
The lovely roadside scenery and the sweet child in his arms were both too pleasant. Tang Can did not take out his phone until they got off the truck. Since there had been no signal in the mountain and he had barely used it, the battery remained quite full.
Tang Can first bought three bottles of water nearby. He opened one for the child and handed one to the driver, who was waiting to unload his cargo. After asking him a few questions, Tang Can took the child straight toward the driver’s personally recommended restaurant.
At this hour, most tourists were still playing in the mountains and had not yet returned. So even though it was close to mealtime, the restaurant’s main dining hall remained spacious and empty.
Tang Can accepted the menu, sat down with the child in his arms, and looked through it together.
Although he had now become a “wealthy tycoon” carrying the enormous fortune of one thousand yuan, Tang Can still habitually glanced at the prices beside each dish.
Perhaps because Changyun Village had only recently been developed for tourism, even one of the largest restaurants here was not particularly expensive. At the very least, prices were lower than in Yun City, instantly making Tang Can’s thousand yuan feel more valuable.
Tang Can began ordering directly according to the driver’s recommendations. “Cold cauliflower-mushroom salad, chicken stewed with mushrooms, iron-pot stew, braised pork bones, local wide starch noodles, three-earth-fresh vegetables, dry-fried silkworm pupae…”
For every dish Tang Can named, the drooling child beside him softly echoed an adorably mangled version. “Cauliflower mushwoom~ chicken and mushwooms~ iron pot stew, big bones, special wide noodles, three-fresh veg…”
Another passionate rainstorm of comments swept across the screen:
【AAAAAH THE BABY VOICE IS TOO CUTE!!! I’M DEAD!!!】
【We can tell. Our baby Dengdeng really is hungry. Look at all that little drool, hahahaha.】
【Oh, this father-son pair is too funny. Tang Can is ordering dishes with the swagger of a country tycoon, while Dengdeng is the little garlic-peeling sidekick sitting beside the rich man~】
【Forget Dengdeng, even I’m hungry. Free-range chicken, wild vegetables, fresh mountain produce—you can tell just thinking about it that it’ll be delicious!】
【Pfft… You may not believe this, but the three groups still inside the mountain are currently eating cold vegetarian boxed lunches. The comparison is brutal!】
At the restaurant, however, the waitress frowned more deeply with every dish Tang Can listed. Tang Can did not understand. “Is something wrong?”
The waitress looked at the beautiful father and child, both thin as sheets of paper, then looked at the three staff members following Tang Can. All three had ordinary builds and none looked like competitive eaters. So she asked, “Are more people coming?”
Tang Can: “?”
“No. Just the two of us.”
The waitress almost rolled her eyes. “With your tiny bird stomachs, one dish would be enough. Two at most. Our restaurant doesn’t allow food waste.”
Tang Can soon learned that the slightly higher-looking prices here corresponded to serving sizes that were basically entire basins. The kitchen had never made small portions and did not know how. His plan to taste many different dishes at once was impossible.
The child’s little face collapsed. Tang Can turned toward the filming crew behind him. “Brother, can you guys eat with us?”
Brother Guo swallowed. “That probably isn’t allowed…”
The moment Tang Can heard uncertainty, he slapped his thigh. “Why wouldn’t it be allowed? It’s not like I can’t afford it. Besides, wasting food would go against the production team’s proper values.”
Tang Can waved grandly. “If there’s no rule forbidding it, that means it’s allowed!”
Seeing father and son look at them with identical expectation, the three staff members exchanged glances. Without much hesitation, they swallowed their saliva and sat down too.
It was not that their willpower was weak. The guests assembled at four-thirty. Wage slaves like them had to wake up at three to prepare.
The guests had walked into the mountain holding their children’s hands. The crew had carried equipment into the mountain.
They earned less than these celebrity guests while doing more work and suffering far more.
There was no need to recount the blood and tears of working people. Because Tang Can had chosen to act separately from the original plan, lunch hour had arrived and the staff following him could not even get the cold boxed meals the production team had carried into the mountain.
The three of them suffered in silence and could only hope Tang Can and his child would eat their fill and find somewhere to nap afterward. Then the crew might finally have time to rotate and grab a bite.
This situation had actually been caused by poor planning from the production team, which had refused to separate out the crew’s boxed lunches in advance. The plan was to carry the meals deeper into the mountain and use them later to manipulate the other three guest groups.
But under the pressure of exhaustion and hunger, resentment had already begun transferring targets. The three staff members spent their time directly facing Tang Can, so naturally their thoughts revolved around him. It was inevitable that they would wonder whether they would have suffered less if Tang Can had not gone down the mountain.
Especially when they had to watch Tang Can earn money and enjoy a feast alone. Whether it was the director and assistant directors—the “leaders” who had actually caused the situation—or Tang Can, the “coworker” whose decision had directly contributed to their misery, the exploited employees wanted to detonate the entire world.
Unexpectedly, that tiny spark of indiscriminate resentment had barely appeared when Tang Can stuffed a huge braised pork bone into their mouths.
Ice melted. Snow vanished. Flowers bloomed. It seemed to happen in a single instant.
One second they had wanted to mow down Tang Can and their bosses together. The next, they only wanted to smash their bosses’ heads to pieces to cheer Tang Can on.
Delicious! It was unbelievably delicious!!
Of course, nothing Tang Can did was ever entirely free of a wicked little scheme.
The hot-spring villa for that night was too far from here. In order to sample more dishes at once, Tang Can ordered only one bowl containing about two hundred grams of rice and divided it among four adults and one child. No one was allowed extra water; if they became thirsty, they could sip some soup. His sole goal was to make everyone devote their full capacity to devouring the dishes so he could order several more.
By the end of lunch, the four adults were nearly bursting at the seams. Only the child had been restricted to about ninety percent full.
The child pouted his oily little mouth, his beautiful face clearly declaring that he had not eaten enough.
Tang Can smiled and rubbed his fluffy head. “You’re still a little baby. If you eat too much at once, you can get indigestion and become sick.”
During the several good meals Dengdeng had eaten with Tang Can before, he had always eaten however much Tang Can gave him and had never dared ask for more.
Before that, he had certainly never had the opportunity to suffer from overeating. So this was an entirely new concept to the child. His large eyes blinked repeatedly, and inwardly he remained only half convinced.
Tang Can put the child down and planned to walk him around for a while to help digestion, then find somewhere suitable for an afternoon nap.
After father and son wandered for a while, both were struggling to keep their eyes open. Tang Can picked up the toddler, whose battery was now completely drained, and after considering several options returned to the guesthouse where they had stayed the previous night.
The conditions were ordinary, but the location was excellent and the place was kept very clean.
They could rent a room for a few hours and sleep. After waking up, they could still go try several places nearby that the driver had recommended—fried skewers, grilled skewers, pan-fried starch jelly, grilled cold noodles…
Knowing his child was a little glutton, Tang Can did not dare tell him in advance.
The child was already dazed with exhaustion. Full and hydrated, he dropped down and immediately fell asleep.
Tang Can climbed into bed while swallowing at the thought of the food, looked at the child already sleeping like a sweet little piglet near the edge of the mattress, and could not resist admiring inwardly what an attentive, wonderful father he was.
If he had told the child in advance, the little guy would definitely be thinking about the delicious food just like Tang Can and would not sleep peacefully. A father as considerate and careful as him deserved one cuddle, surely?
Tang Can cautiously drew the child into his arms, happily kissed the soft hair on top of his head, and only then closed his eyes with a satisfied expression.
*
Meanwhile, the three groups still working desperately to scrape together food in the mountain were experiencing unprecedented misery.
Although they had not seen so much as a trace of proper ginseng or valuable Ganoderma, the three families had not come away completely empty-handed. Cen Jiaojiao carried a huge cloth bag of cheap artist’s conk, while Wen Tong had gathered a large bag of the chicken-of-the-woods they had eaten that morning.
Tang Yichen chose a separate route with very little foot traffic. Although he encountered quite a lot of kidney-tonic tea and schisandra, the tea all grew too high for him to reach, while he considered schisandra too cheap to bother with.
After searching and searching, he ended up picking only some blue honeysuckle berries and hardy kiwi—wild fruit useful mainly for eating as snacks. At that point he could no longer afford to look down on schisandra, so he doubled back, planning to harvest all the plants he had passed.
After enduring this long without seeing a single valuable item, reduced to gathering scraps as a safety net, even Tang Yichen could no longer smile. Beisheng, who insisted on being first in everything, was even worse.
Losing to that tiny bean Dengdeng had already been difficult enough to accept. Now, after suffering in the mountain for so long, they had not found anything worth as much as the little bit of “grass” Tang Can and his child had stripped from a tree in the outer area.
Obviously, they were going to lose both the food and lodging categories. Counting the previous night’s room-allocation event, that meant three losses in a row!
Naturally, Gu Beisheng would never think this was his fault. His stepfather had insisted on joining the show, yet could not gather kidney-tonic tea the way Tang Can had. Clearly, his stepfather was incompetent.
Gu Beisheng threw the little wooden stick in his hand beside Tang Yichen’s feet, lifted his legs, and ran in another direction. He did not want his stepfather holding him back anymore.
There were staff and guides following them, but if anything happened to this little ancestor, his grandparents would unquestionably hold Tang Yichen responsible first. Tang Yichen had no choice but to abandon the schisandra he had only half harvested and turn to chase his stepson.
The more viciously he cursed inside, the gentler his voice became when he called out, “Beisheng, wait for Daddy. Don’t fall!”
Gu Beisheng ran even faster, doing his best to escape Tang Yichen. Yet as father and son chased each other, they actually stumbled across something valuable—a massive shed antler from a red deer.
Standing upright, the antler was more than a head taller than four-and-a-half-year-old Beisheng. Not only was it huge, it was dense too, weighing three or four kilograms by itself.
They did not even need to ask whether it was valuable. The guide nodded and said this was a rare treasure one could encounter only through luck.
The guide then explained that red deer antlers generally shed naturally around early spring. Once one side dropped, the deer’s balance became uneven, so it would usually knock the other antler off as quickly as possible. There was a good chance the matching one was nearby.
Father and son were immediately delighted. Before the guide had even finished talking, they began searching carefully. After more than half an hour, they really did find the second antler.
The livestream erupted in cheers:
【They won, they won, they won! Antlers this huge and still a complete pair! They’ll easily crush that worthless grass Tang Can picked!】
【As expected of Beisheng! Our all-purpose lucky young master!!!】
【Holy crap, that’s incredible. Won’t Tang Can be red-eyed with jealousy?】
【Probably not… I saw Tang Can find Ganoderma too…】
【Seriously? Tch. He really does have ridiculous dumb luck. But Ganoderma won’t matter. For pure value, giant antlers like these have to win!】
【Can we not mention that unlucky father-and-son pair when we’re celebrating? Our Yichen is just too good-tempered. Otherwise…】
Although Beisheng still had enough energy to walk down the mountain by himself, carrying both antlers was a little too heavy even for Tang Yichen, especially with several kilograms of wild fruit and schisandra already on his body.
Without hesitation, Tang Yichen threw away the wild fruit, hoisted one antler in each hand, and began heading down the mountain.
The antlers truly were an extraordinary surprise. Tang Yichen had nearly given up hope, and his sudden joy made him overlook the guide’s hesitant expression.
Not long after they began descending, rain suddenly started pouring in the mountain. Tang Yichen and Beisheng were caught completely off guard and were forced to shelter inside a filthy tent.
Beisheng’s obsession with cleanliness made every second agonizing, and the only thing sustaining him was the enormous antlers he had discovered.
Tang Yichen was even more buoyant. Not only had they found a rare and valuable matching pair of antlers, he was also about to see news of Tang Can suffering a catastrophic downfall.
Thinking this, he did not even feel cold despite his soaked clothes. He actually felt heat rising through his body.
When the guide pulled wrinkled dry clothes from his bag, Tang Yichen not only refused them, he subtly implied that he had an excellent constitution and ran naturally hot. He even wanted to take one layer off to cool down.
The guide’s expression management failed entirely. He stared at Tang Yichen for a long moment as though looking at an idiot, then took a deep breath and reminded him in the helpless tone of someone thinking, earning money is hard and every job comes with humiliation, “That isn’t you running hot. You’re already starting to become hypothermic, you enormous fool!”
*
Tang Can slept for three hours with the child in his arms and was finally awakened by his bladder.
The mountain trip had consumed far more energy than he expected. All three hours felt like deep sleep, and waking now was extraordinarily difficult. He even developed a mild case of waking irritability.
At times like this, Tang Can always wished his bladder could painlessly take over and drain itself without requiring his participation, but clearly that was impossible.
Tang Can lay there for a long time before managing to boot up. Rubbing his eyes, he muttered quietly, “What kind of high-status water is this? I have to personally let it out…”
He was still feeling irritated when he lowered his head and saw the child’s little face pressed against his chest. His bad mood vanished in one second.
The child’s face was rosy-white from sleep. Doll-like thick lashes cast two shadows beneath his eyes. His delicate nose bridge was high and slightly upturned, his pink little mouth faintly pursed… You could not find a doll this beautiful, and this was actually his child!
The child’s beauty was his father’s glory!
Not only was he beautiful, he was so obedient that his old father’s heart softened on a daily basis. On top of that, Tang Can earned a monthly salary of one hundred thousand yuan for raising him. Following that line of thought successfully filled Tang Can with smug happiness.
With a sweet expression, he blew the child an air-kiss full of love. Then he carefully eased the little boy out of his arms and tiptoed toward the bathroom. Because of that, he failed to notice the complicated expression that swiftly appeared on the supposedly sleeping child’s face behind him.
Tang Can noticed a staff member in the corner frantically waving a large sign in silence: 【MALICIOUS TRENDING TOPIC. DO NOT LOOK AT YOUR PHONE!】
Tang Can: …?
He had only just awakened and was still a little foggy. He had been debating whether, since the child was asleep and there was nothing for him to do, he should simply sleep again—though he worried too much daytime sleep would leave him unable to sleep at night. Seeing that sign immediately woke him completely!
Well, well. So it had finally arrived. As expected, Tang Yichen’s people apparently felt physically uncomfortable if they went even one day without smearing him.
After using the bathroom, Tang Can hurried back to the bed. Ignoring the well-meaning staff members, whose eyes were practically popping out from trying to warn him, he smiled, unlocked his phone, and directly read the two characters at the top of the trending list aloud. “Mistress? Pfft…”
They obviously knew he could not mention anything related to the Huo family, so they had simply dumped an entire basin of filthy water over his head… They could have called him a home-wrecker or kept man, but deliberately chose an old-fashioned word like “mistress” instead. It was more eye-catching and more memorable.
If the plan succeeded, this nearly obsolete expression would probably become his personal nickname forever.
Once that label was nailed onto him, he would never be able to raise his head again. No matter how many years passed, mention the word and people would immediately remember him as a shameful third party who could never be acknowledged openly… Truly the work of a gold-medal manager.
In the novel, this portion about the parenting show focused mainly on the fated childhood meeting between the male and female protagonists, as well as the various signs that the villain had begun darkening from toddlerhood. Tang Can, the cannon-fodder biological father, received little attention. Only the section connected with his eventual prison sentence was described in detail.
But Tang Can’s extraordinary professional competence and determination to protect this heavenly job meant that, aside from unconscious-coma-level sleep, he could overcome any difficulty!
It was time to teach everyone the meaning of a certain kind of profound love: carrying your marriage certificate with you at all times.
*
At the same time, in Yun City.
Huo Jingyuan sat in a car heading toward the Huo family’s old residence, his hands loosely clasped over his legs. His long eyes were half lowered and his body rested against the seatback in an extremely relaxed posture.
The secretary in the front passenger seat suddenly spun around and shrieked for confirmation. “What?! You’re postponing the shareholders’ meeting to go to a parenting show?!”
A parenting show? Was it the parenting show he was thinking of?! Secretary Chi nearly shoved his glasses hard enough to produce sparks across the bridge of his nose.
He had assumed Huo Jingyuan had discharged himself early and returned to the country for the shareholders’ meeting. Now he was being told it was because he planned to go to the parenting show Tang Can was filming…
Tang Can existed directly on top of every one of Secretary Chi’s danger zones. Now his boss voluntarily wanted to dance on the minefield. Secretary Chi’s processor was about to burn out, and every word left his mouth in a high-pitched squeak. “But the shareholders’ meeting! You! How can! This…”
His secretary had suddenly transformed into a screaming chicken. Huo Jingyuan did not even lift his eyelids. “Enough. Arrange it as quickly as possible.”
The shareholders’ meeting was important, but attending it would only make wedding clothes for someone else. Better to overturn everything entirely…
Yet before they even reached the old residence, Secretary Chi, sitting directly in front of Huo Jingyuan, produced another high-pitched squeal. “President Huo! Tang Can actually—he actually!!!”
Huo Jingyuan pressed his fingers to his brow and increasingly felt that promoting a person like this to the position of trusted secretary made dying violently in the street seem entirely reasonable.
